Friday, 17 September 2010

Mope comes to Middle Earth

Where do I begin, news is coming in through all the normal channels and from those on the ground. Mobile phones are creating their own type of news in Macebook and Mitter. I was astonished to receive a photographic image of the Mope, kissing our virgin Middle Earth soil. The less said the better. I am pleased to say the Mope was not allowed through customs and immigrations. We have enough people looking for a job here and he has not been castrated. They all know the rules, if you are a Catholic priest you will have to be castrated. No exceptions, you guys are naughty.

Now the good news, Middle Earth has won a huge contract. In partnership with Middle Smiths and that fine Italian family Canosa of Claudosa, we have secured the continuation of Middle Earth with out the need to raise tax. At the time of going to press Gary of Middle Smiths confirmed that MSD Exports will be supplying the poor people of Anotherdale with food. Bruno of Claudosa is in Italy negotiating on behalf of MSD Exports for Pasta, Olive Oil, Huge tins of chopped tomatoes, cheese and most important of all, Pinot Grigio. Bruno, father of Claudia of Middle Smiths, goes with our blessing, may the force be with you.

I have notice a few disparaging remarks as to the lack of news, just to reassure those who post comments, I love you all and long live the comments and opinions. I must, in my defence, say that all this modern news delivery is putting a heavy burden on the press room of the Middle Earth Publication department. I have now implemented a fiendish plot to stop unwanted news items, it is called Mamm Filter and has the Maac seal of approval.

Register of Important People updated: I do believe we are ready for any important thing that might befall us now.

The Matriarch – Mother of Middle Earth and Witch of All Wisdom. (Waw)
Fulia of Faydale – Member in Charge of Borough Affairs and Associations. (Baa)
Fess of Faydale – Member in Charge of the Population Register and Archivest (Pras)
Middle Smiths - Member for Anotherdale Affairs and Commerce (Maac).
Robert – Secretary of Diplomatic Peacekeeping. (Dp)
Michael – Member in Charge of Recreation. (Fun)

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